Colby Keller Recites “Types of Bitches”

Earlier this March my ever-adorable husband, Colby Keller, blogged about “Types of Bitches.” A list thought to be compiled by a 3rd grader — these scraps of paper were found by the teacher of said 3rd grade class. There are just under 100 different types of bitches, according to this list!

You will note that Colby takes a moment of silence, there seems to be a page missing that held 16 of the 90 (#44-58). No one knows what these missing 16 are, so Colby silences himself while going through 44-58.

Says Colby:

Remember this post on the list of Types of Bitches? Well, I decided to make a fun video clip of me reading the list, with significant pause for the 16 missing bitches (ie the holy grail of that 3rd grade classroom). Who are the 16 missing bitches?

Maybe we should write a battle star galactica-type sci fi series where the ninety-odd existing bitches go searching across the galaxies for the 16 missing bitches…

The fact that he used a fracking BSG reference makes me love him more — that may just be my inner nerd poking through, though (one who never saw a single episode of BSG in his life, I’ll have you know. Smite me later, nerds).

For now, enjoy the video!

UPDATE: Colby’s math is wrong. There are 15 missing bitches, not 16! He’s still awful pretty, though!

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